By John Moltz
November 10, 2023 2:00 PM PT
This Week in Apple: Sweet solutions
The new Macs are here! The new Macs are here! But Apple would like iMac fans to go ahead and buy the 24-inch model, please. Meanwhile, remember Intel?
Happy new Macs to all who purchase and celebrate
Reviews of the new Macs are out and, just between you and me…
…come a little closer…
…they’re apparently good machines.
I know, right?
Spoiler alert: these new Macs are faster overall than the previous Macs. Some might say the M3-based MacBooks are the fastest MacBooks Apple’s ever shipped. In fact, Apple said that very thing. Which is what they say every time they update the MacBook Pro.
Still, the consensus about the now-shipping machines is pretty clear: they’re good Macs! Jason says “the Apple silicon iMac is charismatic and fun”.
What was surprising was to find that many units shipped not with the latest and greatest operating system, but with macOS Ventura, leading to a bit of confusion. Apparently Apple has been holding these devices for a while, perhaps building up stock. Or maybe they were just so good the company selfishly wanted to hang on to them.
Sometimes you get attached. It happens.
The Goldilocks iMac
As a rule, you should never hold your breath for Mac updates. I don’t care if you are a professional free diver, Brenda, that’s just too long for a human being to hold their breath!
Looking to cut off any severe cases of oxygen deprivation, Apple told several media outlets this week that it has not working on a 27-inch iMac. An Apple spokesperson was heard to remark “24 inches should be enough for anyone.”
I mean, maybe. That’s gotta be a joke someone at Apple’s made.
Now, you might be saying “Ah! But the rumors of a larger iMac were about a 32-inch model! Surely, then, that is what they’ll start selling any day now!” First of all, really consider what sort of image you’re projecting by talking aloud to a web site. Everyone at the coffee shop is slowly moving away from you. Second, sure, it’s possible Apple is telling people out of one side of its mouth that the 24-inch iMac is where it’s at — the sweet spot (not to be confused with the sweet solution) — while working out the other side of its mouth on its secret GIANT IMAC PROJECT. But it’s also possible they’d rather get you to spend more money on a Studio Display and a Mac mini or Mac Studio.
We’ve spent a lot of time talking about how confusing some of Apple’s product lines are. Maybe we shouldn’t be chomping at the bit for another iMac.
Intel still says it’s on
Usually you can tell when it’s on with Intel because of all the fan noise (zing!) but in case you couldn’t, Intel CEO Pat Intel…
Wait, that’s not his name. Pat Gelsinger, that’s his name. (Look, we call Tim Cook “Tim Apple”, would it kill him to be “Pat Intel”?)
Anyway, Intel. Apparently they still make processors. Really. Not only that, they’re set to make processor magic.
“Intel races to catch rivals as AI boom supercharges chip competition”
The company has set its sights on making faster processors faster, by which I mean more quickly. Fast processors delivered fastly.
Hey, there’s a free catchphrase for you, Pat Intel. Use it in good health.
Other than getting better performance per watt, the other reason Apple and Intel parted ways was because of Intel’s slow delivery schedule, exacerbated by the company’s insistence on spending two weeks camping out at every lake it was going to name a processor after. (Not a true story as far as I know.) Now, after Apple’s departure, a fire’s been lit under Intel’s behind. Or is it sitting on one of its own processors? Tough to tell the difference.
The company does have its work cut out for it in terms of delivering processors than can match Apple silicon in terms of performance per watt, but let’s say this battle is just heating up.
Because of the excessively high temperatures that Intel processors run at.
They’re warm processors. I can’t stress that enough.
[John Moltz is a Six Colors contributor. You can find him on Mastodon at Mastodon.social/@moltz and he sells items with references you might get on Cotton Bureau.]