By John Moltz
February 16, 2024 2:00 PM PT
This Week in Apple: Returns of the Red Eyes
The Vision Pro was fun until my brain started leaking out of my ears! Heck, even Mark Zuckerberg doesn’t like it. Guess we’ll just have to hope Apple has some new products planned.
Side effects include
As the cutoff date for Vision Pro returns approaches, some are sending back the device, citing nausea and other detrimental physical effects such as reddened eyes as their reasons for wanting their $3,500 back.
“Apple fans are starting to return their Vision Pros”
Apple fans like… this person who works at Google.
…For Carter Gibson, a senior manager working on community management and moderation at Google, it’s the finer details. Things like futzing around with windows and file management are productivity deal-breakers.
That may seem an odd person to pick, but that’s just one of the “Apple fans” The Verge quotes in the piece. Others include The Verge’s own product manager, the CEO of an AI company, a random Reddit user (the only one who comes across as a real “Apple fan”), and a “tech influencer” whose pinned post shows him holding a foldable and says “Hard to deny Samsung is winning right now.”
There might also be a number of people—sorry, “Apple fans”—who bought the Vision Pro to be stunt users in Cybertrucks, restaurants, and rodeos, then found they had no more use for the device once they got the clicks they wanted.
Still, the Vision Pro is expensive and it is a more physical experience than almost any other product. You might put up with an OK fit with your $250 AirPods Pro, but you’re way less likely to do that with something that costs $3,500.
And, to be honest, the concerns about nausea and other physical side effects are the second biggest reason this writer doesn’t have a Vision Pro, the first being not having been gifted one by a wealthy passerby in a fancy limousine.
“Say, my good man. I happen to be driving around handing out the latest doodaddle from the fruit company! Enjoy!”
“Thank you, Mr. Spendington!”
Too many NopingOutToMars-ingtons and not enough Spendingtons in this world.
The last word in Vision Pro reactions
Speaking of Apple fans, even noted Apple fan Mark Zuckerberg doesn’t seem to think much of the Vision Pro. (Hey, if Samsung foldable dude is an Apple fan, why not Mark Zuckerberg, too?)
“After trying the Vision Pro, Mark Zuckerberg says Quest 3 ‘is the better product, period’”
Well, there ya go. Case = closed.
Zuckerberg made his comments in an Instagram video this week. Later (I guess because he’s so Meta), he followed up to explain why he posted the video. Turns out it’s because of “Apple fanboys”.
“I just saw the media coverage around this was just sort of breathlessly assuming that, I think because it’s Apple and because it was such an expensive product, like it must be the better one in quality, even though a lot of people are saying, hey, no, you should go buy Quest 3…”
Many people are saying.
”…we’re a company that moves pretty quickly, so I actually think we’ll probably move faster.”
Unless it has anything to do with content moderation. In which case it’s Apple’s fault.
Coming attractions
So, Apple released some new headset thing that’s supposed to be a big deal. But that was weeks ago. What has the company done for me lately?
Word on Frequently Unreliable St. is that Apple will hold a March event which will, after the company failed to introduce any last year, finally include new iPads (FINALLY) and even a new MacBook Air (FINALLY!).
That third finally was also for the iPads.
A sketchy rumor suggests Apple has stopped work on a foldable iPhone because the screen kept breaking. Advantage: Samsung yet again. Their users love screens that break.
There’s still that HomePod with a screen rumor to hang your hat on (although that will make it harder to hear) and Apple may add AI coding features to Xcode this year.
Apple rumors, it turns out, are a perpetually renewable resource. If only we could find a way to burn them cleanly.
[John Moltz is a Six Colors contributor. You can find him on Mastodon at Mastodon.social/@moltz and he sells items with references you might get on Cotton Bureau.]