This Week in Apple: Everybody needs money, that’s why they call it money

With John Moltz traversing America’s heartland, it falls to me, his trusty editor, to step in and fill his shoes. After five days in hell, I’m here with only one goal: to recap the week in Apple news. To do so, I’ll have to become someone else. Something else.

Sorry, wrong show.

As Apple’s annual September event closes in, the speculation continues apace. With apologies to the Klondike Bar: 🎶 What would you payyyyy for an iPhone Pro?🎶 Plus, Mr. Cook goes to Washington, and just another reason why 2025 won’t be like 1984.

The price is wrong, Bob

In a world of tariffs and inflation, one thing has remained largely consistent for the last few years: iPhone prices. But nothing lasts forever, as my scratched and disintegrating CD of Boyz II Men’s “Cooleyhighharmony” reminds me.

According to a J.P. Morgan analyst, some models will be more expensive than before.…